Editorial by John Ziegler

Quite A Week for Death/Heaven/Hell

4/3/2005

A Little "Stand Up" Fun With Death

Well, it has been quite a week for death, heaven, and hell in the news, with all of these high profile deaths the cable news channels are reportedly are now all vying to sign the grim reaper to an exclusive consulting contract. Apparently the reaper is holding out for a management positon, but experts say he is probably not hardened enough for the cut throat world of TV.

Of course Johnnie Cochran passed away this week. That must have been quite a scene at the gates of heaven. Think about that, Johnnie Cochran trying to argue his way through the pearly gates?.coming up with desperate bad rhymes? My guess is St. Peter had none of it, reminded him of O.J. sins and then declared 'If the Halo don't fit, we must not admit.'

Then came Terry Schiavo, she was finally allowed to pass away... though just this morning he parents made an emergency appeal to the 11th circuit court to get their TV appearance rights restored. Heaven was really confused when she showed up, you see they were expecting her 15 years earlier, they were so baffled by her late arrival they didn't even recognize her. I understand they got so confused that after talking to her for a few minutes they just presumed that she was one of the jurors from the Robert Blake murder trial.

Then finally came the death of Pope John Paul II. Did you hear that they gave the Pope last rights not once but twice in his last couple of days on earth. I find this amazing, first of all, you give some one last rights because you are trying to help them get into heaven by wiping away their sins, this the Pope were talking about, if he is going to have trouble getting into heaven the rest of us are totally screwed. But then they gave him last rights again a day and a half later? exactly how much could the pope have sinned while on his death bed? Raises some interesting questions about what was really going on in that apartment, doesn't it???

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